Now, don’t get me wrong, I am no expert nor do I pretend to be when it comes to motherhood. I don’t have a degree being a mom, and as I endure this journey for the third time, I am reminding myself of the simple things that can make a huge difference in the role as a mom and even be reminders of who I was before having the title of Mom (the best title I could ask for!)
I currently am reading Rachel Hollis’s "Girl, Wash your Face", and she even talks about this in the chapter: I Don’t Know How to Be a Mom. Rachel talks about the “issues” new moms and even new dads face once they become parents. The sleepless nights, the endless tiredness, the baby belly that just doesn’t seem to want to go away, or who even invented cluster feeding. She even hits the hard subject of postpartum depression and what is (was) like to feel like a complete failure. Rachel goes on to talk about the two most important things to remember on your daily list of goals as a new (or maybe new-veteran mom):
- Take care of baby
- Take care of yourself
As like every chapter in, "Girl, Wash your Face", Rachel shares four things that helped her during this new journey of her life. Through reading Rachel’s book I have learned some helpful tips and although I am no best selling author, I have a few tips of my own to share that may help you feel like YOU again.
1) Take a shower-daily! No, I am serious, this is coming from my own advice. First off, personally, I like a shower every day to start but I feel after baby, when most times you may just be sitting at home, a shower can make the day feel so much better. It may only be 5 seconds (okay, maybe not that short!) but take the shower. No matter what time of day, no matter how long. Heck, you can even put on the clothing you just had on, but I bet just the overall fact of getting refreshed will make you feel better.
2) Get out of the HOUSE!-You may be thinking but germs? No, seriously, even Ms. Hollis shares this during the chapter. Get out of the house, Every. Single. Day. Just like the shower thing, this is going to make you feel better. Whether it be a walk around the block, a drive down the street with the windows open and your favorite music playing, leave the mess behind and get some fresh air. Do what you have to do give yourself that reminder that there is life outside of the house and you are still part of it.
3) Don’t compare yourself, your postpartum journey or your baby to anyone else’s. You may think this is a given, we shouldn’t ever compare, but let’s face it with social media these days, this one is easier to forget than not. Everyone’s journey in motherhood is different, from our pregnancy to your postpartum journey. If you need to stay away from social media altogether, but do yourself a favor and give yourself a break.
4) Do something for you! Maybe this means finding a new hobby, finding that hobby you once loved, but find something for YOU. For me, this is exercise, of course, once my body is ready for that again after having a baby. This may be a workout in my home, a run outside with my dad or a workout with my mom tribe (more on this next). Maybe YOU time, means a girls’ night out, getting your nails done but remember you need that time for yourself too!
5) Find Your Tribe/Village; motherhood wasn’t meant to be done alone, and even though help from family and friends is great, you still need that mom village to lean on. Check out a mommy and me group, and although I just told you to stay away from social media maybe even find an online group to join. There are plenty of options out there. Find your interest and connect with the moms there. This is something FIT4MOM can do for you. We are more than just a workout community but a village of moms coming together to get through this stage of life. I found FIT4MOM last year right before I found out I was expecting my third and the moms I have met and the village we are building is part of my motherhood journey. For more on FIT4MOM and classes near you check us out at: https://reading.fit4mom.com/learn-more
Whether you are just beginning your journey under the title of motherhood, or this is your second, third or fourth go around, we invite you to join us at FIT4MOM.
I have shared a few tips and thoughts on how to remind yourself that you are more than a mom. Everyone has their own journey in motherhood, but please remember that you were someone before becoming a mom, and it’s okay to take some time to continue to be that someone.
Kaitlyn Day is mom to three and owner of FIT4MOM Reading. All are welcome at FIT4MOM’s classes and activities. For more information click here.
